I’m teaching this summer and can’t help but notice that students fall into one of several types. Each type is characterized by a very specific personality and mannerisms. Here are the ones I think are most prevalent:
The Quiet Asian: She (yes yes, it’s always a she) sits in the middle row all the way to one side. She never participates and is always frantically taking notes. Come exam time expect many many emails from her about whether or not X is on the exam.
The I Want to Be Funny But Actually Look Dumb Guy: He (always a he) loves to make poorly timed jokes about the content of the class in an attempt to be the class clown. Unfortunately, the class clown (who I love but usually doesn’t exist in business school) has already made that joke…and did it well. Sorry guy, too little too late.
The I Only Heard One Part of the Question Girl: She (again, usually she, but sometimes he) isn’t really paying attention, but something about what I asked the class resonated with her and she feels the need to contribute. Unfortunately, although I find her ideas about her pet fish interesting, they are only marginally related the US Bottled Water market.
The I’m Smarter Than Everyone Else Here Girl: She (yah yah, stop complaining) feels like her opinion is always right, regardless of what I (the professor) have to say about it. Certainly blue is objectively better than green. I mean who could argue with that? Right.
The Repeat Whatever The Last Person Said Guy: He loves to hear his own voice…especially when answering questions that have already been answered. Somehow he feels that when he says it, it counts, but when the person immediately before him spoke, he was probably just kidding.
The Eye Rolling Expert: He, for whatever reason, has decided to stop working as the head of marketing at some major corporation and return to school. Of course, now he’s in my Intro to Marketing course. Every comment out of my mouth is echoed by an eye roll from him followed by: “well when I was doing it, we did it this way.” Thanks guy, you’re a big help.
The Head-Nodder: This is my favorite person in class (honestly, no sarcasm here). He (usually he, though sometimes she) doesn’t participate much but, without fail, every time I look at him he is nodding his head in agreement. If ever I wanted affirmation that I’m getting my point across, I just look at him. Thanks Head-Nodder!
So who have I missed?
The After-Class Guerrilla — Rarely says much during a seminar, but darts with impressive speed to appear between you and the door immediately following the adjournment of lecture. He or she will attempt to communicate that s/he is deeply interested in the topic of the day by asking a sequence of increasingly obtuse questions about the one part of the lecture that you don’t actually know much about.
Email on the Sly Guy — This student will never appear in class without a laptop actively running some form of entertaining software through the entirety of the lecture. If you’re lucky, he’ll glance up when “I Only Heard One Part of the Question Girl” makes herself known and smile appreciatively for the recap. Resist the urge to offer advice on his Solitaire game based on the cards visibly reflected in his glasses.